And he walked slowly, carefully, taking measured steps.
Not too slow. But not too fast certainly. Seeking the balance.
The ground below seemed to move by in a blur, contrasting the stone wall he was walking on, which from his perspective seemed nearly immobile despite his moving feet.
Further and further shrunk the pavement.
He wondered why he was doing this. Why he was so afraid. Why his feet continued moving forward, despite him willing them to stop.
After all, he had no reason to walk to the end of a stone wall leading to nowhere.
After all, he had walked along steeper precipices and narrower walkways without falling.
So why was he still moving forward despite his brain screaming for his legs to stop? Why was his brain even screaming? Why was he feeling the dizzying rush of adrenaline and a tinge of fear?
Answers. He had none.
All it would take would be a fraction of a second. A temporary weakness in either of his knees, or a bad landing of his feet. He could imagine the inevitable fall, as his arms flailed out helplessly, of the pavement rushing up to meet him, of the dull crack as his head met the sidewalk.
The thought of it made his legs grow numb. Nonetheless they continued moving. Slowly. Not so surely. He should have had stopped then. But he couldn't. Wouldn't.
To his surprise he found himself still in one piece at the end of the wall. Looking over the edge he felt the same dizzying numbness again. This time, he succumbed to the weakness in his knees. Sat down at the edge of the wall. And pondered.
He watched the shadow of the tree overhead gradually elongate, watched as the clouds drifted by. Caught a leaf flying past. Let it go again and watched as it slowly fluttered down to the ground, landing in the shade of the very wall he sat on.
When he next looked up the the clouds had already moved on. He could feel the sun burning his face and knew it was time to go. One way or another. Glancing down, he could see the floor, a long way from his dangling feet. Would he survive the drop? Could he? Should he?
Perhaps, but for another day, he thought. Not yet. Not just yet. So he turned around and got up. Felt the same terrifying numbness as he got onto his feet. Looked at the distance he had come and knew he could easily cross it again. If he was lucky. He took a step forward...
